When someone mentions courage, we usually think of wrestling bears or facing down terrorists, but godly courage is so much more than that! Courage is doing your duty despite your fears. Sometimes courage even looks like cowardice…
“Why don’t you try it? It’s really cool,” the older boy said.
“No. I…I…I can’t.” Tom slowly said.
“Why not? Everybody’s doing it. You don’t want to be left out. All dudes do it,” his challenger promised.
“No. It’s just not right,” blurted out Tom.
“I dare you! You’re just scared. Hey guys! Tom’s scared to try. Sissy!” the older boy sneered.
Write your own ending. Does Tom resist, daring the mockery of his peers, or does he succumb, afraid to be the butt of their jokes?
How hard to teach our sons that true courage lies in doing what’s right, even when you’re made to look like a coward. It’s the real coward that violates his conscience rather than be teased, falsely accused or ostracized. A real man cares more about righteousness than fitting in.
Our son told us, sadly, that most Christians at his college were so worried about being thought “weird” that they were ineffective for Christ. He said that the only believers who were more afraid of what God thought than their peers had been homeschooled.
That seemed odd to us, so we put a lot of thought into it. Quite a few of the other young adults had come from Christian homes, even ministers’ families. Quite a few of them had gone to Christian schools. What was the difference?
We realized that the homeschooled young people had fellowshipped with other kids mainly in the context of families, or groups of children with the mothers present. That had limited their exposure to the unhealthy coercion of their peers until they were old enough to understand the irony of, “You’re just afraid to do something you don’t want to do anyway.” Yeah, those that fall for that are afraid – afraid of their peers!
Regardless of how your boys are educated, they need to really get this about courage: Courage is about doing what’s right, no matter what. It also really helps to plainly understand who’s more powerful; the Creator or the people He created – even when they act like animals, destroying the weak.
Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities… because it is the quality which guarantees all others. ~Winston Churchill
I sought the LORD, and He heard me,
And delivered me from all my fears.
They looked to Him and were radiant,
And their faces were not ashamed.
This poor man cried out, and the LORD heard him,
And saved him out of all his troubles.
The angel of the LORD encamps all around those who fear Him,
And delivers them. Psalm 34:4-7
The fear of the Lord is the cure for fear and the root of true courage.
Hal & Melanie
We’d love to have you join us on Facebook, Twitter, and at our home blog, Raising Real Men, where you can find great resources for growing godly sons, including our book, Raising Real Men: Surviving, Teaching, and Appreciating Boys, 2011 Book of the Year by the Christian Small Publishers Association and Hero Tales from American History, our audiobook series by Theodore Roosevelt that will tell your guys the stories of the great men of courage that built this country.


































I am so glad to read this post! I just started reading your book and I LOVE IT! Finally someone else who feels the same way as I do…that boys need to be BOYS! Most of my friends have girls or if they have boys they want their boys to behave like girls. I have a very rambunctious, super smart, very physical, and curious 6year old son. I used to be the kind of Mom that wanted to change my son so he would act according to what society wanted of him. In the last year I have come to realize that I was wrong. I am now completely at peace with letting him be who is he because GOD created him to be perfect, in HIS likeness. God created my son as HE wanted my son to be. Yes, there are areas where I know I need to mold him still (fighting in meanness, obedience, respect, etc.). But it’s nice to hear from others that it’s okay to let him run around whacking himself in the head with a stick at the park (most Moms around here think I am nuts for letting him play with sticks), get dirty, and make messes. They don’t understand that he is just testing the boundaries and trying to figure out his place in life. They don’t appreciate all that God has put into my son…all of these unique qualities (even the annoying ones) were placed into my son because that’s how GOD wants him to be.
thank you for this post, it’s really important to show courage through examples as well, at least that’s what works with us
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