After our 2nd date I knew I wanted to marry him.
And after countless more dates, we got hitched. After the wedding, we had more dates still. And after the babies came…well, not so many.
Our kiddos are 11 and 7, and we still haven’t figured out how to go out on regular dates. Our situation has always been complicated by our military lifestyle and my husband’s traveling. We have been able to round up babysitters through the years in the form of church ladies or responsible teenagers. Also, we have swapped sitting duties with friends of ours, taking their kids so they could go out and vice versa. But, as far as scheduling a weekly (or even monthly!) babysitter for a regular date night? It hasn’t happened.
Would I like to get out more with my man? Yep, and I probably should make a more intentional effort towards that goal. But I’m not beating myself up over it.
Because my man and I do date, we just don’t often leave the house to do so.
For us, a date is about connecting and conversation. It’s about discussing the days’ highs and lows, what is going on and what we want to go on in our family. It’s about taking time to remember what attracted us to each other in the first place and why we got hitched. This can happen outside and inside our home.
After our kiddos are in bed (which is somewhere between 8 and 9 on weeknights), we sit on the couch and just talk. This doesn’t happen every night, but it does happen more often than not. Sometimes we share a treat, sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we will talk for 10 minutes, sometimes an hour. Sometimes we stop to work on respective duties, sometimes we stop to watch a movie. Either way, we are connecting and that’s the important part of any date. We are investing time in each other so we remain boyfriend and girlfriend as well as husband and wife.
We don’t do this perfectly. We both have to intentionally shut the laptops and ignore the shouting “to do’s” calling from both work and home (so hard sometimes)! David may work late or I may have an evening activity. Life happens and unexpected events suck the night dry.
All we can do is the best we can do.
Why date your man? Because your relationship with him is the most important one. The best gift you can give your young’uns is a model of a healthy marriage where love is displayed.
And a little PDA. Seriously.
Hey, someday these kiddos are going to fly the coup and the only ones home will be you and your man.
What do you do to remain your husband’s girlfriend and nurture your relationship with him? Do you find that dating happens more inside or outside your home?